Lifting the Fog

 

‘She was always just there - at piano recitals, every holiday, and every graduation ceremony. She was a pillar of my life, a constant I took for granted as young people tend to do. I didn’t start to fully understand or appreciate her until my youthful fog lifted’. 

words of tribute from JP, her youngest granddaughter, when the family gathered to be with one another and bid a last farewell. 

JP and her 'pillar'

‘…. until my youthful fog lifted …..’ 

Recently at her service, there was no shortage of heartfelt, heartwarming words offered. But JP’s words stuck, like the jingle in your head that won’t quit, akin to a meteorologic fog descending to blanket the earth and  refusing to dissipate. 

Lifting the fog to fully understand and appreciate what we have is such a good and valuable action. Unfortunately it is often not done or done too late. As 2025 begins, lifting the fog has an even greater imperative. More on this later … 

For now, who was the pillar?

She was born Rachel Faust in the Polish town Przeworsk in 1927 - don’t bother trying to pronounce the name, it takes years of dedicated, tongue-twisting practice. Born Rachel, she lived part of her life as Helena Krokos, the illegitimate daughter of a cousin’s Catholic housekeeper.  

Rachel owes her long life to Ms. Krokos whose birth certificate she was more than fortunate to obtain in 1943. The document allowed her to pose as a non-Jew and survive deportations and certain death in Nazi occupied Eastern Europe. Then for the next eighty years she was Helen Gruenfeld, wife to Martin, another Holocaust survivor with a fancy dance step complemented by an unquenchable spark for life. They fell in love at a post-war Displaced Persons camp in Austria.  

She was beautiful, elegant, strong, intelligent, brave, and loving. Always impeccably dressed, she worked and drove until her nineties, read voraciously and ... she was untouchable in head to head Scrabble matches. 

She was the matriarch, my aunt, and now the last of our family’s survivor generation. JP’s older sister expressed it best, ‘we are who we are because she was who she was’. May her life be as a blessing.

Now, back into the fog and lifting it for 2025 …..

 

Realizing I’m not speaking for everyone, I know I share the same whole body emotional deflation as a large cohort, those who worked tirelessly throughout the 2024 election season to achieve a forward vision for the country and the world different from that of the incoming administration. 

© Marek Bennett 2024

We were in shock as the votes were tallied. There were no exit ramps for a different outcome paved by either hanging chads or ‘found’ boxes of ballots. It was clear we lost. What previously had been unimaginable had just become reality for the next four years. A dense, seemingly impenetrable fog of dread enveloped us. We became immobilized. How could we move forward?

Then the fog lifted.

The way forward for now is embracing what JP realized about her grandma Helen when her youthful fog lifted. It may feel formulaic, but appreciate all that you have, and do it now. Start with the inner circle of family then gradually widen the circle. End in reengaging with the many struggles to repair our world. There'll be plenty for you to do later.

As Yogi said, “it ain’t over until it’s over”. It’s a marathon, not a sprint.

all non vintage images © David Greenfield